This too shall pass. It's a saying I never heard until I became a mother. Often referenced in light of frustrating or exhausting times, it what mothers are told to help see the light at the end of the tunnel. I have used it. But I have used it in moments of love and comfort, not just desperation.
I may be creating bad habits by letting Caleb nap on me. I may be creating a bad habit by not working harder at getting him to sleep at night. And there are others...but this too shall pass. It won't be too long until Caleb is too heavy to hold in my arms, until he sleeps through the night and doesn't need us for comfort, until he doesn't want to nap, until he will no longer need me for his meals, or until he doesn't want us when he cries. But there are parts of me that really don't mind waking up at night despite how exhausted I am. There are parts of me that don't mind changing every single diaper of his, or even the blowouts as odd as that sounds. Because....this too shall pass.
Right now I am focusing on my family. I have never taken a break from working really hard at my career, I have always volunteered for every opportunity at work, and worked towards the next promotion. In fact, since I was twelve, I have always had a job. I have never given myself a break. Partly because I needed the money (granted, at twelve I can't justify how much I really
needed the money), but much of that because I have simply worked really hard to get where I wanted to go. But now, for a little while or maybe forever, I am taking a middle seat to my career. I can never get back these moments with my family and Caleb, Danny and I will only grow older.....and this too shall pass.
Update*
I wrote this blog a few weeks back, and never got around to posting it. But Caleb is now sleeping in his crib during naps and, I was right, I do miss his warm, cuddly body. While it is nice to get things done, he isn't the best napper. I often to choose between a shower, a quick work out, clean house, nap, reading...etc. before he wakes up again.
We are ninety percent sure he will have teeth emerging soon. His nights have thrown us for a loop again. He found out how to role over in his crib (which he has been doing for a while, but now does it at night) and has become a side and tummy sleeper. That's great and all....except now he cries out when he roles to his tummy at night. As if he were saying, "dang! I didn't mean to roll...and I am too tired to roll back...mooooommmmmm? Daaaaaaad? Help"! So we stumble to his nursery and help him. This too shall pass....
He smiles and giggles when he sees mom and dad. He turns to his name and gets happy and bounces. He loves to watch us doing anything around the house and roles over and over and over. Caleb is becoming much more interested in Maddie. He pets her, stares at her, and has started talking to her. She doesn't quite feel the same toward him but will learn soon enough.
"Quiet down cobwebs, dust go to sleep. I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep"~ From one sleepy mama to another...